"Hey Lloyd, why no write these days?"
"Uhm… life... lack of time?"
"For Christ's sake, you’re no Elon Musk!"
Sighs.
"Let me explain..."
I've been meaning to write something on my 23rd birthday, which was back in February. Due to l̶a̶c̶k̶ o̶f̶ i̶d̶e̶a̶s̶ writer's block, I couldn't release anything by the time I turned exactly 23. I've wanted to write something that summarized my 23 years as a conscious observer in this world. Summarizing my kind-of-out-there philosophies (Donno if it can be commonly accepted?) I wanted to compile all the philosophies that I have been able to muster up until now. Threads of philosophies which kind of form the foundation on the way I think. Maybe like a 'collected essay on life/philosophy' but not as lengthy as a 100-page essay book. It can get a bit vague because I believe spoon-feeding philosophy never works. Hope my figments of philosophies help shape yours, or at least stir some kind of contemplation in you. Forming a strong coherent philosophy a.k.a enlightenment is so crucial than even, let's say, body building (Arnold Schwarzenegger might have some difference of opinion here.) Your mind/brain/consciousness is the very roots of your existence. I might be wrong about this, but at least that's how I see life. Figuring out enlightenment is like decluttering the mental clog. I used to have a lot of nonsensical thoughts and beliefs that consumed my mental well-being. Hence, enlightenment is the key to gaining peace in this consumerist/capitalistic-driven society where there are just billions of ways to sidetrack from your sense of peace. Basically, lots of ways to fuck your tiny brain. This brings me back to my philosophies.
Confused writer: "Oh crap, Am I sounding like a typical Jay Shetty, Robin Sharma book? Is it sounding like those regular horse-shit self-help books?”
Confident-alter-ego writer: "Come on man, you can do better than that! I don't think any piece of information is as bad as Robin Sharma's. No offense, but ugh, that shit sucks."
Confused writer: "Hmm, you make a good point right there, Mr. Confident-alter-ego. Thanks, that helps."
Confident-alter-ego writer: "Now don't be cocky, you're not that great also fyi. Don't think of yourself as some modern-day Camus or Nietzsche writing profound wisdom. Just be yourself. This is fine."
Confused writer: "Cool cool... So where was I? Ah yes, philosophies, let's start with…"
Let's start with purpose, shan't we? Why do we exist? Who are we? What are we? Why are we the way we are? There are so many takes on why we exist. For a long long long time, it had been relied upon religious texts stating "this is this, that is this, thus this is that" which made sense for years. But then, is that it? Are we made from the “dust of the ground” like how it's mentioned in the Bible (Genesis 2:7)? Are we really watched over by a supernatural being, God (Psalm 121:5-8)? Since nobody knows the answer, we can make our answers. Just like the book Kafka on the Shore by Haruki Murakami, life is similar to this postmodernist book. There’s no actual truth, and the actual truth is unknowable. We might have to piece together whatever our limited perception gives to us and make sense of it. Some piece it together with the help of faith and a supernatural being. Some people like to piece it together with their rational thinking and empirical evidences which they think is more reasonable. You believe some books, I believe some books, who's to say who's wrong or right? None. There's no real winner when it comes to whether God exists or not. I've seen and been in countless arguments for, and against, God. And what I come to realize is it doesn't matter whether you are right or the other person is wrong. If it works for you, no need to enforce your thinking onto others. Of course, healthy arguments are good for sharpening your thinking, but apart from that, having a conversation to prove the other wrong is such a waste of time, because there's no way for us to prove or disprove the existence of God.
God, No-God, it all comes down to how you like to view your world. Or realising how your perceptions work and the limits of it. Do you think that consciousness is something immaterial, inexplicable, and is something which possesses its own free will? Or is it something else? As I have explained in my previous article. I don’t buy into it. I’d like to believe that consciousness is nothing but a side-effect of your brain activities. And when you die. It just stops. As simple as that. There is no place for heaven in this explanation. But if you think of consciousness as something immaterial, then many hypotheses can sprout. One such theory that I’ve read about was in the book Why Materialism Is Baloney by Bernardo Kastrup. I picked this book up because it critiques materialism, which is the basic foundation of my philosophies. This book tries to support idealism, the exact definition of this “-ism” is not important here, but the book states that our consciousness is immaterial. And our brain is like an antenna capturing signals of “thoughts” from somewhere abstract (it's immaterial!). So if this philosophy sounds good to you, or even you’re fine with the concept of immaterial things existing, then we can bring out many other abstract hypotheses about life. The limitation for materialists/empiricists is that they believe only stuff that they can perceive and whatever they can perceive is made up of matter. Hence, the question of God doesn't even come up in that framework.
As of now, the workings of the brain and consciousness are all speculation. So you can believe what makes sense most to you. I’m an empiricist/materialist/rationalist (roughly all are related). I believe only things that my perceptions are capable of perceiving. Of course, it's an extremely narrowed view of life if you think about the limitations of your perception. But it made more sense than believing a story that our brain came up with our limited knowledge of the world. This doesn’t mean empiricism is the superior way of thinking. For a long time, I’ve been hearing “Science vs. religion, who’s gonna win?”. Rationalists root for science, and theists root for religion. Science has its limitations. It can never bring absolute truth. And science is nothing but observing a recurring event and finding patterns out of it. That is all that science does. Helping humans lead their lives with a reliable framework. Hence, science will not bring you any closer to the absolute truth, nor will religious understanding. In fact, both science and religion are trying to tell the same thing:- how to lead a good life (if I’m oversimplifying both domains). Science uses critical thinking and religion uses faith. This is it. This is the difference. Period. Pick whichever works for you.
Rant Incoming. I won't blame anyone for going behind high-paying jobs they can attain. Financial stability, a well-fed stomach, a well-fed brain with all kinds of consumeristic toys to juice out that dopamine, peace of mind. Hold on, peace of mind? Does a high-paying job = peace of mind? Unless and until you like whatever you are doing. Are you really happy? I'm still pondering about this (Hopefully I can get this around sometime in the future.) Is over-achieving too normalized in this capitalistic system? I mean, capitalism pushes you to innovate, put in the hours of work, and bring out maximum productivity. But is that necessary? If enough money is there to go about your life, isn't that enough? Maybe this is a complacent thought. But I'm just trying to be sceptical about this. Because capitalism is not all that saintly after all. Sure, it brings innovation, but at what cost? There's something fundamentally broken if one has to lose all his interests and hobbies just to live. Monday. Tuesday. Wednesday. Thursday. Friday. Short-lived Friday euphoria. Already dreading Monday. Repeat. Is it really necessary? Isn't there some kind of balance? (Oh work-life balance, lol). Maybe to achieve the work-life balance, we might have to be ready to be mediocre. Why is it necessary to wait till retirement to start enjoying life piece by piece? Why not now? Who's to say I'm gonna live till the distant future? Why not savour the present instead of anxiously delaying gratification for a future that might never come up? Maybe all these are stupid hedonistic thoughts, but I've rarely heard people talk about being content with life. Everyone is anxiously preparing for the future instead of choosing the present.
Sarcastic-alter-ego writer: "I call bullshit."
Confused writer: "Well..."
Sarcastic-alter-ego writer: "Ah, yes, because struggling under the weight of wealth is obviously sad compared to the 'thrilling' experience of debt, right?"
Confused writer: "…"
Level-headed-alter-ego writer: "Or it's just this country, everyone is working too hard neglecting their balance. Maybe find a different place that respects your lifestyle and the need for tranquillity."
Confused writer: "Hmm… that could be true. Besides, going too anti-capitalist/anti-consumeristic is also problematic." (Just read/watch Fight Club)
So, uhm, yeah, about mediocrity... The point about...
Concerned-alter-ego writer: “What's the matter? Doesn't seem like you're sure about what you wanna write next?”
Confused writer: “Actually I have an idea on what to write next, but I think it'll be shelved as just another hot-take to garner a novel approach to life”
Non-judgemental-alter-ego writer: “Tell me, whatever you wanted to write. No judgements here. This is a safe space”
Confused writer: “I don't think people get mediocrity. You get what I'm saying? Like people get repelled by the very notion of being mediocre at anything! It's a global phenomenon. Even I'm like that. I'm trying to get over it.”
Non-judgemental-alter-ego writer: “Why do you wanna get over it though? Isn't it nice to challenge your own life with milestones that seem unattainable at the present but with hard work and a pinch of luck you attain that milestone? Isn't that feeling the world's best feeling?”
Confused writer: “I get that sentiment. And I am in no way against that feeling. In fact, I'm also against making life stagnant.”
Non-judgemental-alter-ego writer: “Okay… Then why do you think people don't get mediocrity? That's the definition of mediocre, right? Not settling for ‘average’”
Confused writer: “Exactly! You said my concern right there!”
Non-judgemental-alter-ego writer: “Enlighten me”
Confused writer: “For a long time I've been told what to do. ̶M̶a̶d̶e̶ ̶m̶e̶ Helped me pick up science stream in school, ̶F̶o̶r̶c̶e̶d̶ ̶m̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ Advised to take up CS courses since that has more opportunities. I did that as well. So now that I've got a job and become financially independent. Life is limitless. There are just a million ways to lead your life now. And guess what? Now I have no freaking idea what to do with this power in my life. What career path do I have to choose to maintain the equilibrium between genuine passion and monetizing that passion? There's a very limited number of lucky individual who gets to do what they like doing and make a shit ton of money out of it. And the rest? They're called ‘normal people’. Normal people who lead a normal life with normal luxury leading a normal life. At this age, I feel some kind of pressure from somewhere to find ‘that’ thing that I like to do and brings me a lot of money. And this brings me to a dilemma. So far, what I could come up with was, as long as the current job pays your bills, stay there and scratch your itch of passion while free. If possible, try to actively make your 2nd best job as interesting as possible. But deep down you know this thing that you do in your free time is your fulfilment and brings joy to your life.”
Non-judgemental-alter-ego writer: “I'm confused now. How is this related to mediocrity?”
Confused writer: “In this capitalistic society, there is an unconscious tendency to ascribe financial growth to your personal worth. Your personality and worth depend on your career success. Well? I don't know about that. My point is that people have to realize it's okay to lead a "mediocre" life. I would just suggest trying to find the dream job. But failure to find the dream job doesn’t mean failure to live a meaningful life. Heck, life is already meaningless. No matter what you do now, when the sun dies, after the universe’s imminent heat death, there isn't going to be anyone there to celebrate your greatness. So why not live a life that you actually look forward to every day? Being mediocre according to capitalistic standards is fine. And it’s okay if your lifestyle is mediocre, just make sure your thoughts aren’t getting stagnated.”
Non-judgemental-alter-ego writer: “Oh now I get it. Settling for a non-dream job will make you ‘mediocre’ in societal terms because it's not your passion. So you want people to embrace the societal ‘mediocrity’. And try finding your dream, while making sure you’re happy. Did I get that right?”
Confused writer: “Exactly.”
Phew, that was a lot of alter-egos ain't it? So as an ending remark...
Judgemental-alter-ego writer: "Wait wait wait, is there an ending remark to all this?"
Confused writer: "Well? Can't it have one? Isn't it supposed to have one? I always finish my writing like that."
Judgmental-alter-ego writer: "Hmm, yeah. I think that'll reduce your whole thing into two or three sentences. Thats bad"
Confused writer: "Bad? Why do you feel so?"
Judgmental-alter-ego writer: "I don't know, you think people judge because they know what's wrong and right? They just judge and leave. But I feel that's just oversimplifying already simplified ideas."
Confused writer: "Okay Mr. Know-it-all, how do you suggest I end this article then?"
Judgemental-alter-ego writer: "Nothing. Say, nothing."